Episode LI: The Hoppy Monk (SAT)

I celebrated my 33^rd birthday last week and the crew from work wanted to take me out to lunch to get a Reuben. I said thanks, but no thanks. I had a trip to the Hoppy Monk in San Antonio coming up that weekend and I couldn’t be distracted by another Reuben.  We had some great Mexican that day instead.

The Hoppy Monk in El Paso was featured on Episode XL and I often cite it as one of the best Reubens I’ve had. The location in San Antonio has a Reuben de Lengua, which had been on my radar. It was time to check it out and let the world know what happens when you put beef tongue and sauerkraut together.

REUBEN DE LENGUA

“ten-day cured wagyu beef tongue + muenster + sauerkraut + russian sauce + marbled rye”

Appearance – (4.6/5.0)

Lovely stacking.  The marbled rye looks like a cut out cross section of a bullseye. The sauerkraut gives a great visual contrast and the bottom piece has the Russian dressing seeping out.  They may have forgotten the dressing on the top piece. You can also see the salt crystals on the lengua meat and the tiny bits of moisture it pulls out. The fries are generously seasoned with fresh herbs that put some green on the plate.  A flimsy sword/toothpick keeps it all together but overall, a great looking dish. 

Quality of Ingredients – (4.7/5.0)

This one was encroaching on RINO territory (Reuben in name only), by swapping out the corned beef and Swiss cheese, but still had the sauerkraut, marbled rye, and Russian dressing to restore credibility.

Great ingredients and an even better job of marketing them to the customer. The menu and website direct lots of attention to all of the local suppliers and I think that makes the food taste better.  They have the placebo effect working for them here.  When you take a bite, you say to yourself, “Oh yeah, this tastes like it came from that farm I drove by last week in the Hill Country.”  They also have an amazing house made ketchup. Remember, we are in Whataburger country here, so anything that can compete with Whataburger Ketchup and Whataburger Spicy Ketchup has got to be pretty amazing.

This place talks the talk and walks the walk. 

Price – (4.0/5.0)

$11. So this is not cheap, especially for South Texas, but I think the dish as a whole is a good value. For one thing, you know you are paying for the local ingredients.  Another is that they are not shy about bringing you more of the ketchup when you ask. You also know you are paying for the ambiance. There is an awesome beer tap fountain outside and the inside is a long room with community tables so it has the feel of a European beer hall.   

Je Ne Sais Quoi – (4.4/5.0)

Anything that has lengua is going to have a high JNSQ score. I just like this place. I came here a few months back for drinks with friends and that is when I discovered their special Reuben. That was a late night stop with the guys drinking beers and this time I was with my son and two nephews right when they opened early in the day. This place is versatile. The owners are from El Paso, so they have that going for them too. 

Taste – (8.0/10.0)

What happened?! It was too salty for my taste. This might be by design, a marketing trick as old as time.  What do you need with a salty snack? Something to wash it down. The drink menu here is 20 pages long.

I was a fat kid growing up and will be a fat kid for life. I have to watch what I eat (and drink).  I know I can only consume so many calories at a time and I prefer to eat my calories. I realize that this is a microbrew and their whole thing is the beer, I get it. I also grew up in a house where my mother was scared of only three things: scorpions, garlic, and salt. It’s weird. My mom uses very little salt when she cooks and no garlic. So my tolerance for salt is lower than others. What I wanted to do was order a nice local beer, rinse the lengua in the beer to remove the excess salt, then reconstruct the Reuben. I think that would have been awesome. The lengua itself was great and prepared really well. It is a tough cut of meat and usually requires a slow cooker or a pressure cooker to really break it down.  

Overall – (25.7/30.0)

Would I order it again? No.  I had some of my wife’s burger and it was amazing (Burger blogs are a dime a dozen, you can find a write up there); I am getting that next time.  Or maybe the next time I go I’ll drink my calories and get a flight of Texas beer. Either way, I can’t wait to go back.  

Epiosde XL: The Hoppy Monk (ELP)

Welcome to Episode XL of the Reuben Ranger. Not only do we now get to use the Roman numeral L, but we can also - well… I guess that is the only thing that is changing. 40!

I was back in El Paso for a quick weekend trip and I knew I wanted to try out The Hoppy Monk. I had been to the location in San Antonio for drinks but the original is in El Paso. There is not much going on in El Paso, and the fact that we have a hip microbrew pub is a big deal. El Paso is not the place I left 14 years ago, it’s way better.

Reuben
“boar’s head corned beef + fried pickles + house made caraway beer mustard & russian dressing + jewish rye + swiss cheese + sauerkraut”

Appearance – (4.5/5.0)

Wow.  This is a towering sandwich with those two little toothpicks so close together. It reminded me of the John Hancock Center in Chicago.

As much as I complain about toothpicks, sometimes you can argue that they are functional. This Reuben was not cut in half which means the toothpicks really are useless and a public health hazard.  Maybe the Reuben is so tall the toothpicks are just keeping the bread centered and secured on top. If that were the case then one would do. 

The rest of the presentation is smooth. I like the chic newspaper fries, very bistro. The visible green seasoning on the fries give the whole plate a fresh feel. The thick cut corned beef almost looks like bacon! You also get a flash of melted cheese just below the lip of the top bread. 

Quality Of Ingredients – (4.6/5.0)

I was really pleased with the ingredients that went into this Reuben. I read lots of reviews online before going, and one theme was how pleasantly surprised people were with the quality of the food. Everyone knows the beer selection is ridiculous but the quality of the food brings the whole place to another level.

When you talk about a Reuben it starts with the corned beef. I have to look into how you can source Boar’s Head corned beef because that can sometimes be a major letdown.  Remember Episode VI? Some places that advertise Boar’s Head serve it as uniform cold cuts. This was not the case here.  This was thick cut, non-uniform pieces of meat. Can you buy the whole brisket from Boar’s Head? I would think they would have some kind of brand control over when and how places use their name in the product.

Whatever they used, it was great!

Price – (4.0/5.0)

$11.  I remember going out to dinner at Bella Napoli in El Paso as a little kid and the entrees were $5.95. In my mind, anything over that, especially in El Paso, is expensive. I should probably snap out of that thinking.  Double digits in El Paso is not cheap, so it needs to have something to justify that price.  In this case, I think $11 is a good value. The place was hoppying (See what I did there) the whole time we were there.  It can’t be cheap to keep so many beers in stock.

Je Ne Sais Quoi – (4.5/5.0)

This Reuben was something special. I think it was the snow white sauerkraut. It really put me in a daze. Also, without getting too much into taste, it was not as heavy as you would think by looking at it. I felt like I could just keep eating even as I was almost done with it.

The atmosphere of the place also helped. I was there with my Dad watching the NFL playoffs. I emailed ahead that day to make sure they had TVs. There are snobby micro-brew places out there that make a point of not having TVs because the beer should be enough to entertain you. Yeah, I am not that kind of beer drinker and I am glad the Hoppy Monk is not that type of place.

Taste – (9.6/10.0)

When you tell people that you write a Reuben blog, and they realize that you aren’t joking, they always ask, “So where is the best one?”  Up until now I usually mention The ATL Chop House or Candler Park Market.

This one is right up there in the conversation. Wow. It wasn’t too salty; it had great body and bite. It was the whole package. This is where I know I’m an amateur because I can’t really articulate how good it was. Trust me, it is one of the best out there.

Overall – (27.2/30.0)

Would I order it again? Yes!  I will forgive them for the toothpicks. I even hear there is a Lengua Reuben at the San Antonio location! I can’t wait to check that one out.

Thank you to everyone was has supported the Reuben Ranger thus far. Here’s to another 40!